Somebody shoot me…


I can’t keep my hands off of things and started to mess with Windows 10 settings. Bad move. Messed things up and can’t get them back. I got too small in one place and too big in another and I can’t find the screen or get it to go back on its own. My friend (ex-friend obviously) told me I shouldn’t touch anything on here because this is what I do and he is no longer here to fix it.

Met my new medication monitor nurse last night. We get along fine, but she didn’t have any scripts to write new medications and I need refills or I will be back to the mess I had when I forgot my medications all by myself. Plus she doesn’t know how we can get a hold of her for emergencies with the medications. Things weren’t quite ready for a start-up. All that should have been figured out already and to make things worse I hate change.

Oh this setup is driving me crazy. One part is good for the eyes and the other part is minuscule and I am squinting to see it. When will I learn to do what I am told and not to screw around with things I don’t know anything about anymore. I used to be a computer expert and could figure anything out. Now I have to laugh. I am lucky if I can turn the damn thing on. Hmm shouldn’t swear at it, it might get offended. 🙂

I have to figure out what I did because this will drive the last nail in the coffin on my sanity. It said recommended not to change, did I listen? NO!

I spend most of my day on here and will go ape shit soon. I am obviously not fully awake since typing seems to be very difficult right now.

I wish I could keep my damn hands off these scabs as well. My head hurts from tearing at the them. I am trying the rubber band trick. I touch my scabs, I snap the rubber band. I have used it before to stop doing things. Might as well try it again.

Tessa

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16 thoughts on “Somebody shoot me…

    1. Tessa Post author

      I picked at my head until the scabs got big enough to tear into. Disgusting habit, but can’t help myself. Now I have a rubber band on my wrist. If I notice my fingers searching I snap the band. It works, I have done it before.

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      1. emmagc75

        That sucks but I do same thing on my upper arms sometimes without even realizing it. I don’t know why lol. Hasn’t happened for a while but I will try rubber band next time. Thanks! Hugs xo

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        1. Tessa Post author

          You are welcome. It is working already for me although my wrist is red from the snapping. As soon as my hand touches my head I am aware now and snap the band. I have a book written about it. It does work.

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            1. Tessa Post author

              I just got an upsetting phone call and managed to rip them open again. I just found out that I might run out of meds in 2 weeks and have no way to get another prescription. That could cause some serious problems, more serious then bloody scabs on my head.

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                1. Tessa Post author

                  They need someone who can write prescriptions. The nurse was the only one who could and she left and the new one can’t write them. They were supposed to contact the owner who is out on med leave. He is the PHD there. Hopefully he can do something.

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                  1. emmagc75

                    I work with psychologists with PHDs. They are great but cant write scripts. I know it’s a pain but please find a new primary Dr. Tessa. This one is an idiot who is making your life way more difficult. Drs are supposed to do the opposite. Doesn’t believe in fibromyalgia?!? That’s ridiculous! I’m praying for u. Hugs xo.

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                    1. Tessa Post author

                      As I just explained to someone else I can’t search for another dr. With my luck the next one would be worse and I can’t dr jump. Too timid. Nope I have to stay here. Been my dr for 28 years.

                      Liked by 1 person

                    2. emmagc75

                      Oh Tessa. I don’t mean to offend you but you don’t have to do anything. U choose to n that’s okay. I just don’t think you can get much worse than a dr that doesn’t believe in an illness that you have!! I get that it’s really scary, but you can always go back to this crap dr. What exactly does he give u that has kept u for 28 years?? He won’t prescribe meds for 2 illnesses u have! Doctors are supposed to help make our lives better n easier, especially when u have a mental illness!

                      Liked by 1 person

                  2. Tessa Post author

                    That is why we have specialists. PCP’s don’t specialize they just handle the easy regular stuff and most drs don’t believe in Fibromyalgia still. He is not unusual and he shouldn’t be subscribeing psychiatric medicines without knowing what he is doing. I don’t just take an antidepressant. I take mood stabilizers.You don’t mess around with them.

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