Mania, BPD, Delusions of Grandeur…

I have been suffering from delusions of grandeur, the bipolar and the BPD. I also suffer from delusions of the auditory and visual sort. Haven’t even felt like touching the computer much.

I have this idea that I must be better that the average bear.

I wrote a letter to my ex-husband and children. They are all fully grown.  I shot from the hip trying to get him off my chest. Not smart. He thinks I need to be hospitalized and my father agrees for different ideas. He just wants me well.

I might consent to go because I can’t stand the way I am feeling. My medication is not working right.

Physical pain increased.

I will try to give you a heads up if I go.

I have 3 children who care. I am sorry for that K1. I was rude, insensitive and very sorry. I love all 3 of you.




29 thoughts on “Mania, BPD, Delusions of Grandeur…

    1. Each Frame

      First and foremost if you write truths to your ex you have nothing to apologize for.

      You know yourself well. When the medications stop working its time to check with your doctor.

      I sincerely hope you are able to obtain the support and help you need to sit and share you with us.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. morgueticiaatoms

    If you are still on Cymbalta, even at reduced rate, ask the doc/nurse about that first. That stuff had me thinking I was ten feet tall, bulletproof, and I did come off insane. Sadly I didn’t see that until after the fact when I bought a bunch of stuff I couldn’t afford, told off someone who really hadn’t done much to harm me, and oh, yeah, nearly got my power shut off cos…details don’t matter during mania.
    Just a thought. Wish you the best and love ya lots. ❤

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Tessa Post author

      My ex deserves what he got, the kids don’t. They shouldn’t have to pay for his sins. And I should forgive him. I thought I had, and I didn’t even let both barrels go.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Xeno

    i know i haven’t posted here as often (my reader and general feedback has been blowing up!), but remember that I love you with God’s love!!!!! 💗💗💗💗

    been hospitalized once, couldn’t stand the 24/7 artificial light and lack of windows (of all the places to place severely disabled mental patients, the fucking basement? ugh, couldn’t sleep which made the depression worse.)

    If you are to stay elsewhere from the familiar, please scout out the environment of where you are to stay first. (And please have internet and some sort of mobile device to blog from, thank you very much!) You’ll be hearing from me if you don’t. 😬


    Liked by 1 person

  3. Bipolarbrainiac

    For some reason, I was not ‘set to follow’ this blog. I fixed it. Feel free to call, you know my number. I am under the weather, not going to go to gym, even though that’s where I catch up on my reading. Today big Sunday NYT



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