I have been doing my best not to complain about the pain. The family is tired of hearing it and think I use it as an excuse to get out of things. Maybe they are right, but it doesn’t change the pain any. I have been trying to distract myself with writing poems, working on blog. cleaned some of my room because Dad told me to and reading some of the blogs online.
I even went to a football game for my grandson and didn’t mention the pain and how sitting in the bleaches hurt. I just watched the game as much as possible and shut up. I promised the family I would stop pushing them away so that is the reason I went to the game. My grandson didn’t even get to play. My ex-husband was there which still sets my blood to boiling (so much for forgiveness yet), but he was involved mainly with our grandson the Marine who leaves tomorrow for 2 years in Okinawa, Japan. At least he is not in Afghanistan.
I am trying to remember some of the good stuff from when I was married. I am trying to forget the bad stuff, but it sure is hard. More bad than good.
My blood sugar numbers are all over the place. I have no control whatsoever and they say it is the pain and stress causing it. I can hardly wait for the high numbers from the steroid shots.
Tomorrow I have my appointments with the dietician and the nurse at the Diabetes center and then my psycho-therapy appointment. I go every weeks. Lately it has been very emotional.
Teresa (Tessa) Dean Smeigh
-Advocate for Mental and Invisible Illnesses
-Author of Articles, Stories and Poems
http://www.finallyawriter.wordpress.com (moving posts to other blog and will be deleting this one).