Monthly Archives: May 2018

Ahhh life in a high rise

The view around here, remember it is a senior high rise is wheelchairs, electric scooters, old lady shopping carts (that is what we called them but you need one here), and many types of walkers and canes.

The ambulance is here at least once daily most days and some days more. Not all come back.

Today I took a neighbor who needed a ride into town. It is sort of an unwritten rule that those that drive take those that can’t.We have one lady here who is 102. Don’t know if any older or not. I was the driver when my ex was in the Marines. All the wives were stuck without cars and I had ours at the time and then eventually we got another one since we were both working.

My pain is in remission today. I am so happy.

Tessa – advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also devout Christian

Author – (this blog contains my old work), new work is on this blog


Life in the Senior High Rise

My oldest daughter is working hard to get me situated. Being disabled is not easy. Today was rough and my body is aching something fierce. Pain pills not even touching it and because I have an epidural on Tuesday I get no arthritis medicine since it is an NSAID. That is not helping and my knee is still an issue.

I am broke now that I have to pay for rent and electric and 6th floor AC is expensive since it is so hot up here from the heat rising. I have gotten a few things I am eligible for and hoping for help with the electric bill. Applied on Tuesday.

Starting to adjust to living on my own, but it is different. I am not sleeping although not sure why. Whether it is being alone or what.

Tessa – advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also devout Christian

Author – (this blog contains my old work), new work is on this blog


Continuing Life in a Senior High Rise

The sirens are constant. The turnover is constant. Some just someone getting hurt and others are death.

Plus there are the ones moving out (usually against their will) because the family decides they can’t live on their own any longer.

I am still struggling with the alone part. I am waiting on my therapist to come back from a family emergency. They say she is here today. I am trying to get her to do Face Time as my leg can barely hold me up again and I am not able to climb their stairs and since the building is ancient there is no elevator, plus I need to go to the Office on Aging and get help applying for help with my electric bill. They have help for low income families. I have to get it done as soon as possible. I had to wait for the first electric bill. I i did get the cooling grant filled out. The website says I am too late and their office says there was an extension to the end of May and mailed me an application and I had the dr fill it out. I will be glad when all is set up.

Tessa – advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also devout Christian

Author – (this blog contains my old work), new work is on this blog


Life continues in the Senior High Rise

I am shy and quiet and tend to prefer being with people like me. I made one of my first friends (actually exchanged phone numbers and everything). Things started to change when I didn’t come to bingo every night they hold it. I am sorry I have a life, family, dr appointments etc. She is pulling away and that is fine. I prefer the other group I recently met and they are taking me under their wings.

I found myself drifting to the wilder ones and I am so much more happier with them. And tonight the quiet one started some kind of trouble with one of my new friends. Now I don’t know the whole story, but she said something obviously nasty to my newer friend. She did tell her that you don’t treat people that way. Wish I knew exactly what happened.

I have won some of the bingo games. One tonight he said he would add an extra dollar (we play small) if someone got the 4 corners in the first 4 calls. Just then I yelled “Bingo!” The first one to ever do that since they have been playing.

Still have a ton of stuff to put away. Daughter helped again plus my son-in-law put in a new brake light and my brakes are all new. Hopefully no more car maintenance until I can save some more up to pay for it. I have a very tight budget. Got my first electric bill.

I am in pain today. More so than usual and now I have a ton more boxes down so I can go through them. I have to get rid of this stuff.

The last couple of days have been cool and rainy and stormy. Tomorrow is supposed to be hot so will be turning the air back on. Being on the 6th floor might be great in the winter, but tremendously hot in the summer and we pay our own air conditioner whereas they pay the heat and hot water.

Tessa – advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also devout Christian

Author – (this blog contains my old work), new work is on this blog


Between the accident and the new brakes, drums and calipers, money flies out the window

The only thing saving me right now is that I had saved money for the move and things I needed for the apartment. My kids had convinced me to get rid of my household goods after I had been living with Dad for so long. Now I need that stuff. Things might be cheaper at Walmart and the dollar stores, but having my old stuff would have been cheaper yet.

So between the accident 4 weeks ago which was $500 and the new brakes, calipers and drums another $450 just went down the drain. My cushion is almost gone.

Don’t think I mentioned it, but my son’s car is probably totaled. A girl claiming to have only been going 30 MPH hit his heavy car and shoved it 15 feet and up onto the curb. He was in the house. The neighbors came and got him. He wanted a new car, but this was not the way to do it. They will probably total it. The rear axle is broken and the tire is flat and who knows what else. Probably won’t get enough to buy a new car or at least one that is in decent shape and not need constant repairs where this one was finally getting to. What a mess!

It is raining today and has been for days now. Good thing is that I don’t need the air conditioner on right now, a fan on just me is working fine. Haven’t gotten the first electric bill yet.

I still have to set up my budget.This is going to be tight. Hope I can actually eat on what is left after bills. The bankruptcy gave me a new start, but there is still cell phone (and the hot spot runs my WiFi), auto insurance, renter’s insurance, health insurance in addition to Medicare and prescriptions and a ton of doctors. I just have to get well. I am trying to spread the doctor appointments out, but the epidurals for the spine pain are 2 visits per month. I might be able to scrape 1 more appointment in there per month. I now have another hospital copay, as well as the deposits for my electric with the first bill. Been learning how to set up a budget on Youtube. There are a few different ways. I know the envelope and cash way is preferred by many, but not my thing. I prefer to pay everything out of my bank card or automatic withdrawals. Rent I have to pay by check. For years I didn’t have to worry about it, unless it was a car repair.

Tessa – advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also devout Christian

Author – (this blog contains my old work), new work is on this blog


Life in a senior high rise

This has been quite an experience. It has been one month now.

Today I set off the alarms for emergencies such as falling etc. The guard (yes we have guards here) was pounding on the door. Scared the hell out of me but hey I know it works.

So far most of the time I get in a handicapped spot and don’t have to worry about the  placard since I got license plates instead. Some of the closer spots are not handicapped so sometimes it is better to park there. This is at the back door. My guests have to come in the front so I can use the intercom and buzz them in or else I have to go downstairs and let them in. They have to sign in anyhow might as well come in the front although that means they have to walk around to the front door. There are a few spots in the front side of the building, but they rather park out back so if they do they get to walk around. I have an intercom for a reason.

We have been getting a lot of rain and thunderstorms this week. I am on the 6th floor and can see the trees below me swaying in the wind. A unique experience.

I can’t remember if I mentioned the knee going out and the trip to the hospital since I couldn’t put weight on it. Stayed one night and then sent home with no one to help me. I was using a walker for when I had to get up and I had my family take the food and medications and put them down on the counter. The only thing they did for me was a referral for home care, but even though they were covered under my insurance it wasn’t for the services they wanted me to have. They couldn’t get that through their head. Thus I was on my own. Thank God I have hand rails in the bathroom. So far I had one shower. My leg isn’t strong enough to hold my weight to get in and out of the tub so back to basin washing.

I have put a lot of money into my car. The accident cost me $500 in repairs and now another $500 for new brakes and calipers before I have another accident. The brakes just catch and slam the car to a stop as if I slammed on the brakes. Very disconcerting and now I am waiting til Friday for the parts and repair. Only drive if absolutely necessary.

These unplanned expenses are coming out of my apartment fund for things I need. It is dwindling fast. I have to make a very tight budget and live by it and it doesn’t leave much for fun things. I will be lucky if I can get food all month. Since it is public housing my rent is 30% of my disability check so everyone is different. Though it is considered senior housing, they have disabled people like me who are younger. I think the cutoff is 50 for them and must be 62 for a senior. I am 61 1/2.

This apartment is a fair size, but Tessa the hoarder is having a hard time letting things go. I did a bunch before we moved and now I find I must get rid of more. And they do inspections here and can’t have a mess, Trash must go out every day to the trash chute in the hall. Recycles must go downstairs. Kind of annoying, but they are trying to avoid nasty little critters. Exterminator comes tomorrow.

Tessa – advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also devout Christian

Author – (this blog contains my old work), new work is on this blog


So 2 weeks living alone and I injure my knee worse than ever, can’t stand on it

I am such a clutz. My knees have been acting weird and then one decides to pop out of place. Can’t put weight on it, have to struggle dragging a foot with the help of a woman and get in my car. Can’t drive. So now calling the family isn’t just a few minutes They are 30 minutes away and my dad gets lost so thankfully my son came with him to drive my car and find me using GPS.

I was at the library getting a membership and books on budgeting. Not my thing. I need help with that. Have to learn if I am going to make it with my own apartment.

So using my walker and the rollator (has wheels) and 1 footed hopping I am getting around. The only good thing the hospital did was send a referral to a home health care place to see if I qualify for home physical therapy. I told the hospital I was allergic to morphine and how the hospital had to intervene because of my reaction. Ten minutes late that idiot was giving me morphine. I could feel the side-effects starting and finally she turned it off. I was so pissed. It is the worst allergy I have. I also came out with a tremendous cold or allergies or something and it is getting worse. Nothing I have here helps. This hospital has a terrible reputation Wonder why? Hah!

Slowly moving in, but need help. My one daughter is great. I need her to find things especially now since I can’t climb my step stool or get around or lift.

I finally found some of my clothes.

Tessa – advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also devout Christian

Author – (this blog contains my old work), new work is on this blog


Internet connection intermittant

I use my iPhone’s hot spot and unlimited data to use my chromebook and computer. The problem is that not everything will run on it.  Very annoying.

Had men in here working. They remodeled the bathroom and left a very dirty tub bottom twice. I am in terrible pain now and have to get down and scrub at it to get the dirty off. They get in there with their dirty boots on to work. I had to call maintenance because my toilet keeps running and the shower if you put it on shower squirts all over the place. Wonder how long that will take. On Tuesday my daughter and son came over and installed the new energy saving air conditioner. It is large enough to cool the whole apartment. My dad bought it for me. I am so glad since the sixth floor is tremendously hot already. Supposed to go up to 90 degrees F today and tomorrow. I would roast and it aggravates my Asthma. So does the cat. My son was taking care of her when they put me in the room downstairs. We are getting reacquainted again.

I started painting class yesterday. No cost for this activity since the housing department pays for it, but the bingo game does have a small fee. $1.00 for 2 cards which is the lowest amount. As low as that is I might not be able to go every time. It is twice a week and they play several games.

I am slowly putting things away. The pain slows me down and need my oldest daughter to help me. She is responsible and knows how to run a house. I haven’t done that in almost 20 years now. Having my own whole bathroom and kitchen is nice. I still have to cut down on my stuff. What I did already wasn’t enough. Came from large house to one room with some storage in another room and small closet at my dad’s. I still have stuff at dad’s. Maybe one of these days I will get the rest here and this place set up. Hopefully no inspections right away.

I am getting tired. Nap time also almost dinner time. I ate lunch late though. I don’t know why I am getting more and more in pain. I worry about the possibility of having surgery. My external yeast infection is bad right now with all this sweating and trying to keep dry. It likes wet/damp places.

Tessa – advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also devout Christian

Author – (this blog contains my old work), new work is on this blog


7 Ways to Soothe a Fibromyalgia Rash

7 Ways to Soothe a Fibromyalgia Rash

I have terrible rashes and they are many different ones. All of them are very uncomfortable and some really painful. The bad thing for me is that I can’t use creams for relief. They freak me out. I hate the feel of them. So I put up with them.

Tessa – advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also devout Christian

Author – (this blog contains my old work), new work is on this blog