The Family Of Stroke Victims Seen From The Inside

My dad is literally disappearing before our eyes. They don’t tell us much and until today I refrained from looking up symptoms, info and support groups. I need them. I am constantly bothering my therapist who is willing to help me out, but I need to understand more about what is going to possibly happen and be prepared.

My sister is strong. She doesn’t let her emotions ride on her sleeve. Is she scared? Of course she is. She just holds it better. She makes all decisions only when the two of us have talked over what is best for dad and agree to it.

He is losing his memories as his brain continues to die. He doesn’t want to live anymore and wants to be with mom. I understand this and he is letting things go we think. We don’t blame him. He wants to go and as much as that hurts it is something he has a right to want. He has an advanced directive and it states what he wants or doesn’t want. Currently his heart is strong. Heart attack is not likely right now. He talks suicide, but that shouldn’t be easy for him to do. We figure the most he can do is to stop eating and drinking and he has a directive that says no feeding tube or fluids except pain medicine. He hasn’t given up yet, still eating and drinking so he isn’t seriously thinking suicide yet.

The poor man is proud and now he has to have help using the bathroom and is incontinent so wears diapers. He whispers how embarrassed he is. I don’t blame him and right now if I pass over I would rather go in my sleep. We saved him and he doesn’t remember life and how you do things or anything new. Long term memory is going slower. Short term faster.

I am off to look up strokes and find a support group.


Advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also a devout Christian

Author – (this blog contains my old work mostly although occasionally I do add something new here), new work is mainly on this blog

8 thoughts on “The Family Of Stroke Victims Seen From The Inside

  1. ajeanneinthekitchen

    There is help out there. My mother was a stroke victim too. It is the hardest thing to watch someone suffer like that. Take time for yourself. You are not being selfish. You are refilling your well of strength and wellness. It is hard to continue to give to others without replenishing your own needs first. You are not alone. Reach out to others. Listen to them and let them help you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Tessa Post author

      My mother was sick most of her adult life with early onset Parkinson’s Disease and Dementia. My dad took care of her at home although it wasn’t easy. We aren’t able to do that for him and in the long run he wouldn’t want it. I had to stop going almost every day because I was doing a real number on myself. He is being taken care of and we are doing the best that we can for him.

      Liked by 1 person


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