Long Term Care (Nursing Home) Antics

My dad is in long term care now and is still patient pays while we sell his assets and get the government’s (Medicaid) help to pay for it. The house is a wreck and has a reverse mortgage on it which needs to be paid first so not sure what we might get toward his health care from that. He has an older car and some other assets.

Now we never know what kind of day he will be having when we visit. Sometimes he will refuse to talk to us, sometimes he takes a few minutes to figure out who we are, sometimes he tells us how proud he is that we are (my sister and I) are taking care of him and sometimes he tells us we are taking his belongings and making him stay in this place. Today was a good day. My sister, my aunt and cousin were there and all of a sudden my dad says “if anyone knows of a job let me know.” Dementia is kicking in. We are trying to explain to him why he doesn’t need a job and assure him he will be taken care of. Thankfully dinner came then and we could avoid continuing that conversation.


Advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also a devout Christian

Author – http://www.finallyawriter.com (this blog contains my old work mostly although occasionally I do add something new here), new work is mainly on this blog http://www.tessacandoit.com

He has been talking about Zee and Zeke the aliens that come to him. Finally found out today that they are real people, ones an aide and the other works there. They are aware that he thinks they are aliens. Sometimes you just got to laugh.

Now on the annoying side is all the women there have a crush on him and I can’t convince them I am not his wife so they spend the whole time pointing at me and talking about me. They were really making quite a scene of it today and it’s embarrassing.


2 thoughts on “Long Term Care (Nursing Home) Antics

  1. morgueticiaatoms

    My grandma keeps physically attacking the nursing home staff, her dementia is so bad. When she started going after her on son, my uncle, not recognizing him anymore, they started using restraints lest she hurt her own 91 year old body than anyone else.
    It’s a tough thing to see, and reconcile this is the same person you used to know. At least your dad still has lucid moments. Cherish them. My grandma used to have ‘good days’ but she hasn’t had one in over a year, dementia is cruel. Hang in there and just keep being the best daughter and sister you can be. ❤


    1. Tessa Post author

      Tuesday night we were called to go to the hospital as he was not responding. This happened before and he was there over a week. We get there and he is laughing and joking with the nurses and doctors. They asked if he was behaving normal for him. He started crying when we came in and I suppose he expected us to yell at him because he knew they were trying to wake him up but he thought they were monster doctors/aliens who were going to eat his brains so no matter how much it hurt him the technique they use to wake someone in a deep sleep he would simply moan a little. Yelling at him wouldn’t work anyhow. We tried to calm him down and told next time either wake up or let them eat his brains or he would end up going through this again. I know he won’t remember it and this could happen over and over as he thinks the staff in his facility are all aliens. Heaven only knows how much the other nights bill will be. We are still private pay and no medicaid yet. Hope his Medicare and Aetna will pick up most of it since he is supposed to still be covered by them.



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