Category Archives: Family

Covid-19 Strikes Home


Until 2 hours ago I was able to say that I did not personally know anyone with the virus. Then my sister called to say that our dad (in long term care/nursing facility) has now tested positive for the virus. He is asymptomatic and feeling fine. This brings the total of residents with it to 146 and 12 positive employees. 66 of the positive residents are now recovered. They are required by the state to test weekly.

I don’t know much about the asymptomatic cases, but I hope that means he will not get sick himself, he is just a carrier. So far he is fine and a large majority of their cases have been asymptomatic. This makes me wonder just how many people out there are running around spreading the virus because they don’t know they have it. For all I know I may be asymptomatic myself. How many of these loud-mouth know-it-alls who want to reopen the country and stop wearing masks are out there helping the virus to spread? You don’t have to have actual symptoms to be a carrier.

Tessa – 

Advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses

New Author’s Website – http://www.tessadeanauthor.com

Author – Old Writing –  http://www.finallyawriter.com

About my life –  http://www.tessacandoit.com

Author of a book, a work in progress on the blog, https://tessacandoit.com/government-property-a-memoir-as-a-military-wife/

Highlighted chapters are done and ready to be read.

I am also a youtuber in the authortube section on writing. See my videos here:  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSpNS-6gfJ0s8eD1berLwQg

Dad’s Birthday and the Nursing Home


My dad turned 88 yesterday the 19th. He had a stroke so his mind is often not with us. Dementia has also begun. Visiting can sometimes be rough as he has moments where he doesn’t know who we are or he will mix up the family members so he is confused as to which kid belongs to my sister or me or which kids (the grandchildren) belong to our children. We try to explain the relationships to him, but sometimes it is too much for his damaged brain (due to a severe stroke) to understand.

His body is still very strong considering he doesn’t exercise and is in a wheelchair and he looks good for 88 years old. He looks better than I do most of the time.

Due to the coronavirus there has been no visitation for many months. They had just reopened to visitors after the flu was so rampant. They had one employe with the virus, but they were rapidly diagnosed and removed. Two of the residents were sick and tested, but we haven’t heard the test results. They were isolated from the rest of the residents. Compared to a lot of nursing home environments they are doing well protecting their residents and they keep us advised through text message blasts.

Tessa – 

Advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also a devout Christian

Author – http://www.finallyawriter.com (this blog contains my old work mostly although occasionally I do add something new here), new work is mainly on this blog http://www.tessacandoit.com

Author of a book, a work in progress on the blog, https://tessacandoit.com/government-property-a-memoir-as-a-military-wife/

Highlighted chapters are done and ready to be read.

Must use walker at all times


Doctor says I am a fall risk, duh! I was told to use the walker at all times and that included inside my apartment where I usually hobbled about. Finally getting used to it. I was leaving it all over the place LOL! Most of my falls, although not all of them have been in my apartment.

Started the application process for state aid (medicaid) and what a pain it is. Tons of paperwork. Designed to get you to quit most likely.

Pain management doctor took my Percocets away which I figured would happen. I was thinking of not mentioning what happened, but my daughters told me to tell her. What happened was serious. So she told me to cut them in half and she was going to prescribe Nucynta. Problem is the insurance company is fighting it. So I am in more pain because of the half of pill and if she doesn’t get it approved soon I am going to run out of them and I don’t know if the smaller dose would cause withdrawal or not. Of course, the doctor is not returning my phone calls. Even if I get the Nucynta I have to start out on a very small dose so don’t know how much pain relief  I might have anyhow. Chronic pain sucks.

My children have decided that it is too dangerous for me to live alone. Doesn’t leave a lot of options. None of them have room for me and that leaves long term care in a nursing home or assisted living, but that would be expensive since medicaid will cover the medical part, but not a living facility. And the nurse from medicaid that did my assessment agrees with my kids on the living alone part. I have lived alone exactly 3 years in my life total. The nurse is putting me down as needing help in many areas. Now just have to get through the medicaid part which can take months and constant requests for this or that paper. My sister just did it for my dad who is in a long term care facility for his stroke and dementia. This is a different program though.

Tessa – 

Advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also a devout Christian

Author – http://www.finallyawriter.com (this blog contains my old work mostly although occasionally I do add something new here), new work is mainly on this blog http://www.tessacandoit.com

Author of a book, a work in progress on the blog, https://tessacandoit.com/government-property-a-memoir-as-a-military-wife/

Highlighted chapters are done and ready to be read.

Family Christmas 2019


Dad and I

4 generations of family

Tessa – 

Advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also a devout Christian

Author – http://www.finallyawriter.com (this blog contains my old work mostly although occasionally I do add something new here), new work is mainly on this blog http://www.tessacandoit.com

Author of a book, a work in progress on the blog, https://tessacandoit.com/government-property-a-memoir-as-a-military-wife/

Highlighted chapters are done and ready to be read.

My Grandson – Brayden John Hanratty


My Grandson – Brayden John Hanratty was born at 1:18 AM on December 6, 2019. He is doing well despite his rocky development. He was small compared to her almost 9 lb other two boys. He was 7 lbs 2 oz and was 20 inches long.

My daughter is 40 and this is her 3rd child. The other two are 22 (almost) and 13.

Tessa – 

Advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also a devout Christian

Author – http://www.finallyawriter.com (this blog contains my old work mostly although occasionally I do add something new here), new work is mainly on this blog http://www.tessacandoit.com

Author of a book, a work in progress on the blog, https://tessacandoit.com/government-property-a-memoir-as-a-military-wife/

Highlighted chapters are done and ready to be read.

The Dedication For My Book – “MARRIED TO PROPERTY OF UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT – A MEMOIR AS A MILITARY WIFE AND THEN SOME”


I am writing this book and publishing it in a non-traditional way. In other words, I am publishing it on my blog and not charging a fee to people to read it. There are several reasons for it, but any income from it would screw up my government disability and what I am eligible for so no income will be derived from it, just my pleasure in having people read it. I can print out the actual document and make my own book if I want to.

I dedicate this book to my children and their father, Andrew Smeigh. Between us, we had 3 great children and 4 grandchildren (at the time this was written).

I also dedicate this book to our best friends Charles and Kimbaly Stanley who were there for us during the military years and who helped raise our children, while my husband and I were working. My husband was defending our country and I was serving the Officers of the Military at their Officer’s club in their times of recreation.

I also thank Charlie for his service to our country and to Kim for standing by him as a dedicated Military wife.

Thank you,

Teresa Smeigh

Ow!! My son is torturing me!


He is not purposely torturing me, just wanted to get your attention.

However, he is enforcing my doctor’s requirements. He just got his personal training certification and he knows more about my situation and agrees with the doctors.

Every day I get:

  1. did you take your medicine?
  2. did you drink the required amount of water?
  3. and then he drags me out to walk whether I want to or not.

He hates all the medications I take. He thinks I shouldn’t be taking them and he won’t even put aspirin in his body. He tells me I am always drugged up and slurring my words. He parks way far from where we are going and makes me walk. I have a handicapped placard. He rarely lets me use it. He plans to study more on nutrition. I get that from him too. I know I shouldn’t be eating like I do.

I am complaining, but he is doing it for my own good and I love him for it.

Tessa

Advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also a devout Christian

Author – http://www.finallyawriter.com (this blog contains my old work mostly although occasionally I do add something new here), new work is mainly on this blog http://www.tessacandoit.com

Owwiiee! The torture continues!


Now I know he is doing this for my own good and maybe some day I will thank him, but right now I want to go ape shit on him. He is lucky he is my son and therefore a loved one because my doctors gets it full feelings in my funny/sarcastic way. Or perhaps at the top of my lungs depending on my mood. My psycho-therapist and I have had shouting matches. I am stubborn too so that doesn’t help when I get an idea in my head.

Yesterday’s walk was too much and today I am paying for it. I have severe back pain and spasms. Seems to me I got the last spasms from him making me walk. Now we only walked .4 miles and about 15 minutes the doctor’s requirement, but I can’t start that high. 5 minutes tops the first few days. So my son has decided if I am going to go only 5 minutes then I have to do it every day no matter what. I don’t see it that way and I count the walks through the grocery stores and the hike from the car. He doesn’t.

Now that he is a certified personal trainer I am really in trouble. He had to study nutrition with that and so my diet is under siege. Now I know I should eat better. I am overweight and have Diabetes Type 2. I know from experience that losing just 20 or so lbs can make a difference in my blood pressure and glucose numbers. I need to lose 120 lbs to get back to my regular body weight for my size (super short).

Now one of the ways the fibro doctors think helps the pain is to eliminate carbohydrates, white flour products (I think there is something else, but have forgotten it) and gluten from your diet. There goes everything I eat. I hate foods that are GOOD for you. Really hate them and add that to my compulsive eating which is of course everything that is bad for me and I eat from boredom, pain or whatever. I have no self control in a depressed state for sure. I don’t care! Manic I am more apt to follow the daily recommended diet.

Now the good thing about this is that I have a guardian now, which I really needed. He doesn’t buy my excuses and he knows that most of them are excuses. I will admit that. I am good for making excuses. I am also lazy, undisciplined and used to people leaving me alone. When your son lives with you it doesn’t work that way.

Tessa

Advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also a devout Christian

Author – http://www.finallyawriter.com (this blog contains my old work mostly although occasionally I do add something new here), new work is mainly on this blog http://www.tessacandoit.com

Another member of our family – Dash – 2015


Dash

This is our dog Dash!

Dash came from a local rescue center. He is my dad’s dog more than mine. I have the cat. Update – dad in long term care and Dash is with one of dad’s friends who brings him to visit occasionally and I ended up giving the cat to my son, she preferred him.

Tessa

Advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also a devout Christian

Author – http://www.finallyawriter.com (this blog contains my old work mostly although occasionally I do add something new here), new work is mainly on this blog http://www.tessacandoit.com

Terrified! – 2015


I just woke up from some very terrifying dreams/hallucinations or you can laugh if you want a ghost. My whole family believes in ghosts, my mother was a medium and I have been plagued with seeing things since I was young. Could it have been the Bipolar Disorder instead? Then I would have to say that the whole family is plagued by it and I don’t see that. But that is a whole other story. Right now I am dealing with a loss of reality at times. I don’t always feel asleep.

Today was the worst. I couldn’t wake myself up, part of the time I felt awake and that I really and truly heard and saw things. I get a feeling of evil in my mind. Is it in my mind or is it real? Am I losing touch with reality again? I have a little before but this is way past that.

I have told my doctors, but they don’t seem extra concerned, but then the nightmares that I have discussed are family of sorts and they are trying to kill me, every damn night. My doctor says this won’t go away until I forgive the person. I can’t see that happening since the incident happened many years ago when I was a child and I am 62 now. Don’t think forgiving is happening.

But now I hear people calling my name, touching me (ick), and just plain crazy stuff and I can’t wake up if I am asleep. Don’t know what is happening to me. I don’t want to go back to the hospital again. That was horrendous on its own.

Oh I know this sounds crazy and I have to email my psyche nurse who prescribes my medications. Is it them? Is it me? Is it a ghost? I don’t think that person is really trying to kill me. And now my whole family is involved in these crazy dreams.

Tessa

Advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also a devout Christian

Author – http://www.finallyawriter.com (this blog contains my old work mostly although occasionally I do add something new here), new work is mainly on this blog http://www.tessacandoit.com