I am not interested in dating much. The reasons are far and wide.
1.my disorders are many and depending on the activity are beyond my pain and fatigue.
2. I am shy and new people and places scare me.
3. I have been hurt too many times.
I am not looking, but but not giving up completely. I do miss the companionship and support. I am not interested much in sex so that can kill a relationship, but there are others out there looking for companionship only. If it is meant to be, it will be.
Tessa – advocate for mental health and invisible illnesses, also devout Christian
Dr. Wayne Dyer uses that quote above instead of seeing is believing.
Last night before falling asleep I said over and over the “I am” statements. I must not have convinced myself because 5 minutes later my pain increased. Worse than it has been in some time. I have to believe it. Part of me doesn’t. Part of me wants to blame someone else for all my problems.
My faith in God is dwindling right now. I do not believe in him as strongly as I did for a while. What I was afraid would happen didn’t in so many cases, that I should believe more strongly.
I am happy!
I am healthy!
I am prosperous!
I am content!
I am not going to let this stop me. I know there is truth in this and have been successful at times. I must believe it to see it. It makes so much sense.
It just isn’t inside of me to write today. I can write a story usually in 30 to 60 minutes depending on size, but when it isn’t there no matter of coaxing will help.
When it is there I have to let it out. Really strange how that works, for me anyhow.
I don’t know what to do with myself right now. I am bored. I can’t sit still. I have a ton of boxes to go through still, but not much room left and there is still stuff upstairs that I am going to want. I am letting things go, but I am just overflowing with my hoarded stuff.
I need room in my file cabinets and I have 4 drawers worth at least. I used to sort all the medical out and put in files, but it is out of control and I just throw them in piles all over. They are not in any type of numerical/date order so finding anything isn’t easy anyhow. They are mixed up even on one page. Wonder if I should go paperless. I don’t use them for taxes anymore since I don’t make enough to file taxes.
I can’t go paperless with them. Stupid company. No paperless option. I am just going to toss them all. I can get the info online. Same with pharmacy slips.
So I am going through paper and tossing into recycle bag. Not shredding. Nothing too important on the papers.
I am rounding up pics of the kids (grandkids mostly) and putting them in a bag and hanging the newer ones the girls gave me of their kids.
Sun is going in and out. Just wish it would stop at the out point and stay there.