Tag Archives: Life

Affirmations:”God, Give Me Guidance.” Affirmations for Divine Guidance and Help. October 25th, 2017


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Pain is Weird


Pain is weird. I was pain-free for a few days and now it is back, but on the other side of my body. I can’t figure it out. I was so relieved there for a few days and boom, just like that, it is back again.

I can’t figure out if too much movement is the cause, not enough is the cause or that there is no specific reasoning behind it,

I have spent the last few days calling the 2 doctors offices trying to get an appointment for the required EKG. I finally got one today at the very last minute before the procedure. Well slight exaggeration there. The procedure is Tuesday, but no time yet and so need Monday to wait for the time. The EKG is set for the last appointment on Friday afternoon. The day they close early.

I will plan on leaving the house early just in case of problems and just wait in the parking lot for awhile and then in the waiting room. I can’t take any issues such as road construction, detours and such. I was hoping to not have to have it. I really felt better than I had for over the last 7 years, but now it is back.

I just made a payment plan for the MRI’s I had and had to sign a paper so luckily my dad agreed to drive it to the post office for me. I had eased off a little on the pain pills and perhaps that had something to do with it.

I am sitting here in pain. Lying down was feeling better. May be up and down all night till bedtime. I have also had bad stomach pains the last couple of days. Not sure which hurts worse.

Teresa (Tessa) Dean Smeigh

-Advocate for Mental and Invisible Illnesses

-Author of Articles, Stories and Poems

http://www.tessacandoit.com

http://www.finallyawriter.wordpress.com (no longer canceling this blog, just not adding new work to it, sign up for http://www.tessacandoit.com for the new posts).

Affirmations:”God, Give Me Guidance.” Affirmations for Divine Guidance and Help.


Teresa (Tessa) Dean Smeigh

-Advocate for Mental and Invisible Illnesses

-Author of Articles, Stories and Poems

http://www.tessacandoit.com

http://www.finallyawriter.wordpress.com (no longer canceling this blog, just not adding new work to it, sign up for http://www.tessacandoit.com for the new posts).

Faith Healing And Divine Intervention Through God


My father is a faith healer. He uses divine intervention to heal others including me. Now he has been working on my pains daily for weeks now. I can finally say that I am feeling a blessed relief and I don’t believe it is the pain pills finally starting to work. They have shown some minor relief only. This is a deeper feeling of relief. Deep inside. It restores my faith in God. As my father says, “The pain did not come overnight, it is not going to go away overnight either.” He works on my pain daily sometimes twice a day when it has been exceptionally bad.

Below are a few links on faith healing and divine intervention and its relationship to God:

https://www.allaboutgod.com/faith-healing.htm

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Faith_healing

http://www.jimfeeney.org/divinehealing.html

***********

Teresa (Tessa) Dean Smeigh

-Advocate for Mental and Invisible Illnesses

-Author of Articles, Stories and Poems

http://www.tessacandoit.com

http://www.finallyawriter.wordpress.com (no longer canceling this blog, just not adding new work to it, sign up for http://www.tessacandoit.com for the new posts).

Can’t delete my writing blog without it deleting “Tessa Can Do It”


It is time to renew the dot com on Finally A Writer and I had already taken the auto renew off so it wouldn’t auto renew, but right in the middle of posting to “Tessa” it blacked out my screen and told me that if I didn’t renew my writer blog (it is number one in the list so I guess it is the main blog) that no one would see “Tessa Can Do It” and that is the blog I wanted. So I guess the other blog isn’t going anywhere or I lose my “Tessa” blog. Pretty annoyed right now. I just renewed the domain on the writer blog to keep my other blog. I knew they were linked under one address, but thought I could delete the main one and the next one in line would remain and be the new main blog. Obviously not. That is one way to make sure they get their money.

I won’t be updating it. I guess I will not continue to take off what I want and then set it to not be seen in the search engines. I will leave it there. I am still getting new followers despite the notice that I am not updating it anymore. Go figure.

Teresa (Tessa) Dean Smeigh

-Advocate for Mental and Invisible Illnesses

-Author of Articles, Stories and Poems

http://www.tessacandoit.com

http://www.finallyawriter.wordpress.com (no longer moving posts from this one to my “Tessa Can Do It” blog.My older work will remain on this blog if you want to look through it).

Tessa Can Do It! She has to…trying not to just give up.


I started this trip at the ER. My first stop after the station was the orthopedic dr. There the original hope he gave me was snatched back and I was back on the tracks leading to pain management with not a lot of hope to travel with me. Appointments are hard to get and I have to wait. The longer I wait the worse it gets physically and mentally. I am finding it hard not to just give up hope that I will ever be pain-free again. I haven’t been for 40 years (and longer if you count my childhood problems), so where’s the miracle cure going to come from? How do I find that miracle I so much want to believe in.

The closer that appointment comes the more anxiety is building up. I have been told by the dr’s office that this train could veer off the tracks to another track leading to a neurosurgeon rather than just pain management out of which I will probably end up addicted to narcotics if the steroid shots don’t work and they weren’t very successful 7 years ago. I still lived in pain, just a lesser amount. You know they make sure you understand that those shots can make it better, make it worse or simply not work. My neck responded for almost 7 years with very little flare-ups, but my back did not respond at all and continually got worse. The chiropractor was supposed to help, but I cannot say he did really. He claimed he could fix all of my problems and without medications. Of course he pushed expensive nutrients, but no prescription medications. I finally had to tell him that he needed either to try something different or our relationship was over because I was worse off after an adjustment and simply suffered to the next appointment. So he tried to be gentler. I went less often and then this whole mess flared into a much worse situation. When I heard I had several pinched nerves I refused to have him mess with them. Part of me said one wrong movement and he could paralyze me. My faith in chiropractic care is not very strong and when you start messing with damaged nerves it scares me a lot.

This brings me to the religious part. I don’t understand what all this means in God’s plan for me. Back to am I being punished for some past sin, maybe one from another life if you believe in past lives (reincarnation)?

I am thankful to be alive, but I can’t find it in my heart to be thankful I am alive to suffer. I know pain is subjective. I know that some people have it much worse than I, but right now I am focused on me and how I feel. I can pray for others and their pain and suffering and I pray for mine, but it sure is harder when the pain is never gone, always getting worse.

Am I feeling sorry for myself? You bet I am and most of us do in this situation except for a few who get past this point without feeling sorry for themselves and have put all their faith in God. This is one of the reasons I gave up on God for 40 years. I don’t understand the suffering that is in this world or the killing either for that matter. What is it supposed to accomplish. I have been told God doesn’t give you anything you can’t handle. So this proves that I am stronger so heap on the pain?

You know I can’t lie, sit or stand without pain. There is nowhere to escape it. The pain pills are either not working or I am getting used to them and they don’t work as well. I can tell when they are about to wear off. I wake up almost to the hour they are due again.

I still have a week and a half before my pain management appointment. I will run out of pain medicine on that day as well or maybe the day before if I miscalculated which I will figure out closer to the date so I can spread them out if need be.

Tessa Can Do It hardly seems the right name for this blog right now. Will I do it, of course I will, I am stronger than I give myself credit for and for the simple fact I have no choice. I will not take that final step to end my misery because I promised my family and friends I would not do that again. God saved me then, he must have some other plans for me. There will, however, be many tears shed in the next few months or so depending on how things go because sometimes the pain is unbearable despite the pain pills.

God be with me as with you and I pray for any of you who are in similar situations and are dealing with your own pain, whatever that pain may be. God bless us all!!

Teresa (Tessa) Dean Smeigh

-Advocate for Mental and Invisible Illnesses

-Author of Articles, Stories and Poems

http://www.tessacandoit.com

http://www.finallyawriter.wordpress.com (moving posts to other blog and will be deleting this one).

Combining 2 blogs into 1 is not easy!


There is no import for a free blog to a free blog. I must do it by hand. I am deleting a lot that isn’t a story or poem, but the deleting option keeps freezing up and having errors. I am getting quite annoyed. The ones I want to move over take a lot of copy/pasting.

Beginning to wonder whether I should have started this. One blog might be easier, but this is driving me crazy. It is going to take a while and deleting the old stuff I don’t want isn’t working barely at all. WordPress keeps giving me errors.

I have tried trashing them or deleting them and one or two might go, but then I get the errors again.

Although the last time I looked my Facebook connection was back on “Tessa Can Do It” and that is progress. Took them long enough.

Teresa (Tessa) Dean Smeigh

-Advocate for Mental and Invisible Illnesses

-Author of Articles, Stories and Poems

http://www.tessacandoit.com

http://www.finallyawriter.wordpress.com (moving posts to other blog and will be deleting this one).